Since last 2 months a lady who has given birth to triplets visits my hospital to show her children regularly. [20/01/2016]. After the end of first month, the anxiety of mother reduces. In today’s time even if there is one child, the family members gets confused and worried regarding breast feeding, crying etc. but in this case there were three children and that also of weight 1.5 kg to 2 kg. to take care of such tiny tots was the test of patience. It was not possible for the parents alone to take care of the little ones. If there is complete support of the family then only the upbringing of three children is possible. Every time the lady was accompanied by a lady was accompanied by a lady of almost her age. I would easily make out that the lady with the mother was also a family member. The mother use to come and sit on the chair and pose questions in order to get clarification for her doubts. The lady who was accompanying her used to take care of all the three kids. She would unfold the child, open the blankets, weigh them and after that used to cover the child, place them properly. I felt that the mother is quite lucky.
Fourth time when she came to my clinic, I was highly restless because I saw a different lady with her. I asked, “How many women are there in your house of similar age”. The lady told me, “My husband’s sister, my two sister in law and also my sisters. They help me a lot”. Now a days the families are getting smaller and somebody who gets the benefits of so many relations is also very lucky. Mother and mother-in-law are going to give proper attention. But if there are ladies of same age in the house and are of helping nature then the mother need not worry about anything else. And if any of them have elder kids then they understand a mother’s problem completely. In 1957 FATHER WALES had written a book on family values ‘KUTUMB DHARM’. In that he had told to maintain good relations with sisters and sister-in-laws. He had written that if a woman wants to be happy in her life, she should have good terms and friendly relations with all these women- sisters and sister-in-laws. She should try to be her friend and make her the best buddy. Then definitely life would seem beautiful. If she has friendly relations, there would be healthy and happy atmosphere in the house and will never have any stress in any social situation. If a lady manages these relations in beautiful manner, she will be able to manage her kids and house easily. She will be able to take care of everything religiously and smoothly. All the ladies will be her support system for any ups and downs in her life. Even if at times, a need arises that one has to let go certain things, then one must do it and try to nurture these valuable relations and also maintain them. ‘ I did this for her and she did not do this much for me’. One should never fall in all these calculations and should have the attitude of let go. And it is so much fun that in all these relationships, it happens that the ladies interchange their roles. A younger sister-in-law becomes so close as a sister and the sister takes care like a mother. The amount of love and respect the mother has for the sisters and sister-in-laws is observed by the children and they will also have their cousins and aunts and uncles.
As a doctor, we have many a times seen, that because of certain reasons the breast feeding is done by the elder or younger sister-in-laws to each other’s kids. In many families we observed that the eldest aunt is called big mamma or ba by the kids of the family. In 1996-97, there was KATHA organized by SHRI MORARI BAPU in the university ground in Ahmedabad. He gave a piece of advice to all the girls who were going to get married that they should consider their sister-in-laws their own sisters. I don’t know whether this social message should be given over here but when I saw that the sister-in-laws and sisters showering so much love and affection on those three kids and their relations with the mother, I thought of presenting this article over here.